Thoughts You'd Rather Not Have

I'm going to start building models of birds out of chocolates. The first thing I'm going to make is a Malteser falcon.

If Stelios opened a safari park would it be called "Easy Tiger"?

Thank you, and good night.

Why do I find this funny?

Today I got my new Lego mail order catalogue though the post.  (You think this is strange for some reason? Shame on you.) Anyhoo, I found the description for set 7880 "Duplo Big Pirate Ship" to be really funny. At the end it says "Includes four pirates and a monkey." For some reason that I can't explain I just find this amusing.

Word Cartoons

I wish I could draw. I'd draw a picture of someone holding a glass of wine which has a harpoon stuck through it. The caption would be "You know, I think my drink has been spiked".

The Joys of Living with Rob

Me: Can I call you lunchtime?
Number one wife: OK
Me: See you later, lunchtime.

Oh how I laughed.

Profound Thought 0001 of 0001

If God played football would they show the games on "Match of the Deity"?

Specially for Graphics Programmers

I always wanted to make a T shirt with "Fog is nature's way of keeping the frame rate up" written on it.

An Apology

Sorry about this folks. No idea what made me think of it:

"We might have room for you on our hyperventilation course Mr. Miles. But I wouldn't hold your breath..."

Old Joke

Just found this joke in my old blog. So good that I want to share it with you all again:

Q: What does a magician say when he makes a corpse appear out of nowhere?

A: Abracadaver

Profound Question no 1 of 1000

If you copied someone else's outbreak of the Black Death would you get done for plagueurism?

Film Pitch

I've had this idea for a film about a Country and Western singer who starts out by singing on kitchen floors.

I'm going to call it "Walk the Lino".